I Have My Dress!!

This is what it looks like when you get your dress in the mail.

This is what it looks like when you open the box to reveal a sweet purple garment bag!

This is more of what it looks like when you open your garment bag to reveal a slightly cockeyed dress on a hanger and, even though it's been several months since you saw it, it takes your breath away all over again.

My Dress

Here it is! Way more bridal than I thought I would end up with, but so much fun to wear. I want it 100% payed off and in my closet so I can start pondering alterations! I thought about trying to make it more sweetheart, but the beads already give you that illusion. I love the ruched wrapping on top and the asymmetrical way it ends. Love, love.

I Got A Dress!

I was in Atlanta this past week, and I got a dress! I am so excited! I went to Bride Beautiful in Atlanta with my mom and sister, and I ended up deciding on something a bit more bridal than I had originally been thinking of. On my first shopping adventure I didn't feel very much like a bride, if you'll recall. I tried on some completely different styles at this shop, and I definitely felt more like a bride. One-shoulder, huge poufy crinoline (just for fun and it was crazy), and dresses with beads. I guess I needed something a little more traditional after all. P.S...this store has a great selection at great prices. I paid less than half of what I had originally budgeted for my dress.

My original plan to buy something on the cheap that could ideally be altered into a functional party dress was a good one, and one I planned to follow through with, but I didn't have that feeling you get when you find something that is perfect for YOU. No, I am not in search of the illusive magical bridal high that you're supposed to have over every little detail; however, I wanted to buy a dress that I would feel excited about wearing instead of focusing only on the reusable aspect. Having the right dress and being comfortable is important to me.

I am also really glad I went with my mom and sister because they helped me pick. I could easily have gone to several stores and picked something I liked at each, but I would have had trouble committing. I am somewhat indecisive about big things, and thinking "yeah, this is nice, but what if there's something else at another store..." is so something I would do. I am sticking with the advice I took to heart and committing to my decisions. I love my dress and I'm excited about wearing it. It has all the aspects of other dresses I liked and nothing I hate. I want to alter it slightly when it comes in, but that's easy enough to have done in town.

When both your mom and sister spontaneously cry, you know you've found the right dress.

The Trouble With Vintage

It seems that the dominant trend on the indie white girl wedding blogs, as well as the hipster scene, is vintage. Vintage is all the rage and it's a great way to save money, resources, and cut down on consumption. One of my issues with vintage is that I just don't fit the proportions. My hips and my bust are way too big for those little dresses! Plus, I'm tall. Vintage is pretty much out for me, plus I'm not crazy about the look for myself. I'm just wondering why this has become the mainstay of so many alternative wedding blogs. It seems that if you're a mid to late 20's woman getting married and you have a blog, then your aesthetic is largely vintage leaning towards the 50's look. When did the alternagirl wedding blogosphere become so homogonized? Where are the African American, Indian, Asian wedding blogs? Can someone tell me because I haven't found them. Are only white 20-something vintage-loving women blogging about getting married on their own terms? That can't be possible.
I am a reader of some of these blogs, and while I find them very inspirational as well as a forum for discussing issues surrounding marriage and why the Wedding Industrial Complex has made getting married such a crazy process, I'm longing for something a little different. If you love vintage that's great! Go for whatever makes you you, but personally I'm looking for a little more variety. There are a million resources for vintage shops, people who make vintage style clothes, etc, etc. If I wanted that I'd be set, but I wish the blog world would showcase something a little different. For me right now, it's pretty much OffbeatBride or bust. Are you out there non-vintage wedding bloggers? Wedding bloggers of color?

I'm not feeling white...

When I last gushed about my potential wedding dress I threw out the idea that I may not want to wear white. I like the idea of injecting a little color and OH. MY. GOD. Look at this shit. I know, right! Gold. A gold wedding dress. Not Vegas sequins gold, but somewhat antiqued, burnished, more subtle gold. This is so lovely, and definitely something I would wear. You can't dye something gold can you? The search continues.

There is some great advice from this post over at A Practical Wedding. Meghan writes of her wedding:

"Another thing that we did that I think helped a bunch was to make decisions and stick with them...Bought a dress-done. Picked the caterer-done...I had to stop worrying about the choices we were making and just let things be done."

Love this advice because really, with the wedding powers that be shoving pictures and advertisements down your throat you could constantly change your mind. This leads me into my second attempt at wedding dress shopping. I say attempt for a reason.
I heard about Just For You consignment store in Verona, and I really wanted to check it out for the obvious budget and environmentally friendly reasons. Once I went on my first shopping trip, I figured it would be nice to get a dress picked and in the closet. The more I have checked off my list when we set a date, the better, right? I called to get their hours and the woman asks me when I'm getting married. We haven't set a specific date, but we're thinking tentatively fall 2011. I tell her this and the following happens:

Her: I'm going to tell you something that's going to sound kind of weird, but hear me out, okay?
Me: O-kaaay...
H: (adamently) You're looking for a dress too early. You need to stop.
M: (silence)
H: I know how it is, you just got engaged, you're excited, and the first thing you want to do is get a dress. What I'm trying to save you from is buying something now, growing to hate it, and having to buy another one later.
M: ...Well....that certainly gives me something to think about. Thank you.

I've seen it happen on tv where the bride wants a dress for the ceremony and a different one for the rehearsal. That's your perrogative if you want a costume change, but I do not understand growing to hate a dress you liked enough to buy and then ditching it for a whole new one! At least think about alterations or something to make it more like what you want. Come on now, people!
Obviously she wouldn't have given me this advice if she hadn't seen this happen before, but the assumption and the delivery were all wrong. She actually said the words "you need to stop" and I'm pretty sure she doesn't know me or my plans. Also, I don't like being told what to do, especially be strangers with an air of "oh, you'll see" if I don't follow their well-meaning but totally out of place advice. I imagine it's akin to people without children telling an expectant mother how to parent. The tone of this-is-what-brides-do-and-you're-a-bride-so-you-will-obsess-over-your-dress completely turned me off in all of three minutes. Sometimes I feel like I should cut her more slack, but if this is how she views a bride simply asking for her store's hours I can't help but feel it would color the whole experience. I may end up going there in the interest of investigating another local resource and saving money, but i'll check eBay first.

Dress Shopping #1: Premiere Couture

This is kind of how dress shopping felt-a little blurry and kind of a whirlwind. Maybe it's because it was my first serious wedding related shopping trip. Did anyone else have this experience?
This is in no way a reflection of my experience at Premiere Couture. Getting a coupon at a wedding show with an expiration date enticed me to make an appointment. I fell in love with a simple, sassy Nicole Miller dress at the show and was utterly shocked to find that it was well below my $1500 arbitrary dress budget. This dress allowance is in no way based on any kind of arithmetic. I simply guessed what I could spend on a dress and still sleep soundly at night. I've also prioritised our attire as something we care about more than..say...menus and seating charts and stationary. My goal is also to find a wedding dress that can be taken up, dyed, and turned into a party dress for all future occasions. If I could find a great dress within my budget and get 10% off why not get the dress shopping out of the way, right? Remind me to tell you a story about the other point-of-view later.
Anyway, my dressistant asked me what I was looking for/not looking for and my price range, and let me tell you...she delivered. She did not show me one dress over $1500, but there was still a huge range of styles to choose from. I was a little concerned about that since my price limit is on the cheap side of wedding dresses, but I tried on 8 or 9 entirely different styles in my $ range.
I was also worried that I was going to be pressured to buy in a smarmy slick sales-type way, but this never happened. She was much more concerned with my happiness than the price tag or sealing the deal. She was also very knowlegable about body types and the way different fabrics, cuts, and styles worked on me. I really felt like I was being taken care of. I did get to try on the Nicole Miller, and oh my God I found a winner. It is everything I wanted-no pouf, form-fitting, v-neck, open back. It is so f'ing beautiful and it fit my personality and my, but it's sassy! There's a bit of a decolletage issue, if you catch my drift, but my dressistant informed me that this could be fixed with a panel of lace or scrap silk from the hem. I also specifically remember saying that I don't care about the neckline issue. I'll find a way to wear it. *dreamy sigh* I may wear that dress yet. In case you couldn't tell, I am one satisfied customer.
One of my friends I invited along asked me if I felt like a bride, and I think I kind of said yes, but I'm not sure. Upon reflection, I kind of felt like I was playing dress-up and I suppose that's true. I hardly ever dress that fancy. I don't have galas to attend or premieres at which I need to make an appearance. I also have been asking myself the "do I want to wear white" question. I love neutrals and earth tones accented with pops of bright color, and the idea of that on a dress is very appealing. I also avoid white clothing like the plague in everyday life because I get it dirty. The color white has no symbolic meaning for me, but it is part of the iconic bride image, and I may want to take this opportunity to drape myself in a stain prone color just to prove to myself that I can wear white incident-free.

P.S. - Premiere Couture recently had a trunk show featuring a designer who uses sustainable fabrics, and there are dresses featured on their blog made in the USA if that's something you are taking into consideration as you shop. My other friend said she wished she'd known about the store so she could have shopped there for her wedding dress. Definitely check it out, you guys.